Status: Tall Tales
I don't know when the
Chuck Norris facts first appeared on the internet. Many of you might already be aware of them. But just in case you're not, they're worth a look. Here's a few of the facts:
• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
• The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
• If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris
is aware of these "facts" being spread about him. So far, he has generously allowed their authors to live.
Comments
The current count is now up to 212,000, maybe more after I posted this. And go figure, the second link lead me to this page. :D
I think they meant if you google images.
Because if you type in "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" in the images, it returns 0 results.
Killing his girlfriend.
How droll.
:roll:
One of the facts on the page reads "If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen."
"chuck norris sleeps with a nightlight,, not because chuck norris is afraid of the dark, but on because the dark is afraid of chuck norris."
then three posts later.........
Wayne King Hard said:
"chuck norris sleeps with a night light not becos hes scared of the dark but because the dark is scared of chuck norris"
Let me reiterate that for all of you:
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light not because Chuck is scared of the dark, but Because the Dark is scared of Chuck Norris.
I hope all of you can sleep peacefully, now that it was restated three times. Sweet dreams.
Sorry little girl I didn't realize you liked jokes being repeated and repeated and repeated. Do you want me to repeat that? I will.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a nightlight, not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but on because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
(these are so stupid :rollseyes:)
Wayne King Hard said: "chuck norris sleeps with a night light not becos hes scared of the dark but because the dark is scared of chuck norris"
and
Chris Fitch said: "chuck norris sleeps with a nightlight,, not because chuck norris is afraid of the dark, but on because the dark is afraid of chuck norris."
Wow, these are some pretty smart people. They all seem to think a like. Too bad Sakano was the last one to post that. It seems Sakano can't really think for her self. Too bad.
Sakano only retold that joke to push your buttons because small-minded idiots are fun to fuck with.
"Sakano only retold that joke to push your buttons because small-minded idiots are fun to fuck with"
NAH!... Really? Sakano did that to push my buttons? Your quick.
"God, some people are such pathetic whiners"
hmmm...I wonder who's whining now? Take a guess Ace.
Actually little girl, I don't give a shit. You see, as you said, "small-minded idiots are fun to fuck with" You got that right ACEY!
ahhh, *laughter
But, but if you don't feed me I'll go away. NOOO!
ahhhhh *laughter
Don't feed me and I won't feed you.
and he is the only one who can stop it.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.