Get MOH Blog Posts by Email
 | |
 | |
 | |
 | |
 | |
 | |
 | |
 | |
 |
Our Sister Sites
Site Map
Blog Categories
Advertising |
Animals |
April Fools Day |
Art |
Bad Excuses |
Birth/Babies |
Body Manipulation |
Books |
Business/Finance |
Celebrations |
Celebrities |
Con Artists |
Conspiracy Theories |
Crop Circles |
Cryptozoology |
Nessie |
Death |
eBay |
Education |
Email Hoaxes |
Entertainment |
Exploration/Travel |
Extraterrestrial Life |
Fashion |
Folklore/Tall Tales |
Food |
Free Energy |
Future/Time |
Gnomes |
Gross |
Hate Crimes/Terror |
Health/Medicine |
History |
Identity/Imposters |
Journalism |
Law/Police/Crime |
Literature/Language |
Magic |
Mass Delusion |
Military |
Miscellaneous |
Music |
Paranormal |
Pareidolia |
Photos/Videos |
Places |
Politics |
Pranks |
Products |
Pseudoscience |
Psychology |
Radio |
Religion |
Scams |
Science |
Sex/Romance |
Social Networking Sites |
Sports |
Technology |
Urban Legends |
Videos |
Websites
Blog Archives
May, 2013 |
April, 2013 |
March, 2013 |
February, 2013 |
January, 2013 |
October, 2012 |
September, 2012 |
August, 2012 |
July, 2012 |
June, 2012 |
May, 2012 |
April, 2012 |
March, 2012 |
February, 2012 |
January, 2012 |
December, 2011 |
November, 2011 |
October, 2011 |
September, 2011 |
August, 2011 |
November, 2010 |
April, 2010 |
January, 2010 |
December, 2009 |
November, 2009 |
October, 2009 |
September, 2009 |
August, 2009 |
July, 2009 |
June, 2009 |
May, 2009 |
April, 2009 |
March, 2009 |
February, 2009 |
January, 2009 |
December, 2008 |
November, 2008 |
October, 2008 |
September, 2008 |
August, 2008 |
July, 2008 |
June, 2008 |
May, 2008 |
April, 2008 |
March, 2008 |
February, 2008 |
January, 2008 |
December, 2007 |
November, 2007 |
October, 2007 |
September, 2007 |
August, 2007 |
July, 2007 |
June, 2007 |
May, 2007 |
April, 2007 |
March, 2007 |
February, 2007 |
January, 2007 |
December, 2006 |
November, 2006 |
October, 2006 |
September, 2006 |
August, 2006 |
July, 2006 |
June, 2006 |
May, 2006 |
April, 2006 |
March, 2006 |
February, 2006 |
January, 2006 |
December, 2005 |
November, 2005 |
October, 2005 |
September, 2005 |
August, 2005 |
July, 2005 |
June, 2005 |
May, 2005 |
April, 2005 |
March, 2005 |
February, 2005 |
January, 2005 |
December, 2004 |
November, 2004 |
October, 2004 |
September, 2004 |
August, 2004 |
July, 2004 |
June, 2004 |
May, 2004 |
April, 2004 |
March, 2004 |
February, 2004 |
January, 2004 |
December, 2003 |
November, 2003 |
October, 2003 |
September, 2003 |
August, 2003 |
July, 2003 |
June, 2003 |
May, 2003 |
January, 2003 |
November, 2002 |
October, 2002 |
September, 2002 |
August, 2002 |
July, 2002 |
Chuck Norris Facts
Status: Tall Tales
I don't know when the Chuck Norris facts first appeared on the internet. Many of you might already be aware of them. But just in case you're not, they're worth a look. Here's a few of the facts:• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
• The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
• If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris is aware of these "facts" being spread about him. So far, he has generously allowed their authors to live.
|
Categories: Celebrities, Folklore/Tall Tales Posted by Alex on Fri Jan 13, 2006 |
Comments (280) |
| More from the Hoax Museum Archives: | |||
chuck norris doesnt chuck, he fucks
Posted by john in delta on Fri Dec 07, 2007 at 11:12 PM
As legend has it, if you scratch your balls, then rub Chuck Norris's beard while calling him a panzy. You will become the smartest man alive. Then so that all is made right the universe will correct it's self and knock you down a peg. Don't believe me ask Steven Hawkins.
Posted by Courtney in Chicago on Thu Dec 13, 2007 at 10:33 PM
Those are Used jokes this is origonal.The red sea is red because Chuck Norris Lived there For 0000000001 Sec.The reason why u Float in the red sea is because is becaus Chuck Norris wants to "Hide" the evidence.The FBI already Knows Their just to scared to tell Chuck.
Posted by IreshMan 37 on Thu Dec 27, 2007 at 07:24 PM
When Chuck Norris walks, he isn't moving forward, but spinning the earth with his feet. With this, Chuck Norris inspired the log-run and the treadmill.
Posted by Matux on Thu Jan 03, 2008 at 04:53 PM
People always wonder what would happen if chuck norris was black
Its simple, if chuck norris was black white people would have been the slaves
Posted by TJ in New York on Thu Jan 17, 2008 at 09:14 PM
Its simple, if chuck norris was black white people would have been the slaves
Chuck Norris once ran 10,000 mph... in slow motion.
Posted by FredFredBurger in Washington State on Sun Jan 20, 2008 at 01:33 AM
In 1972 a man asked Chuck Norris after the release of Way of the Dragon "what was it like to get your ass kicked." He was promptly round house kicked so hard that he was the first object to leave the solar system not Pioneer 10. Chuck Norris just lets all of us believe that Pioneer 10 was the first.
Posted by Jon on Thu Jan 24, 2008 at 07:06 PM
Chuck Norris pees sitting down because he can!
Posted by Bribo in Ohio on Fri Jan 25, 2008 at 07:54 AM
When a werwolf looks at a full moon he turns into Chuck Norris!
Posted by REUBEN STEVENS on Tue Jan 29, 2008 at 01:28 PM
People pray to god, God prays to Chuck Norris
Posted by DITES in Scotland on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:13 PM
The UN have put sanctions on Iran......because they fear they are trying to develop a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick!!!!!!
Posted by DITES in Scotland on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:19 PM
Reincarnation occurs when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you in2 your next life
Posted by DITES in Scotland on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:40 PM
Chuck Norris does not get constipated, His shits just to scared to come out
Posted by DITES in Scotland on Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 06:48 PM
"Chuck Norris once ate four 72. oz steaks in one hour, but had sex with the waitress for the first forty five minutes."
Posted by Chris Wiese in United States on Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 09:12 AM
Is there an official Chuck Norris Submission procedure. If not, I'm starting here with...
Little girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice. Little boys are made of slugs and snails and puppy-dog's tails. Chuck Norris is made of four Bengal tigers and a gorilla.
Posted by Funtboy on Tue Feb 05, 2008 at 12:49 PM
Little girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice. Little boys are made of slugs and snails and puppy-dog's tails. Chuck Norris is made of four Bengal tigers and a gorilla.
'Roundhouse Kick' is an anagram of 'Chuck Norris'. If you choose to not believe this, the anagram will manifest itself in sentient form and roundhouse kick you to death.
Posted by Funtboy on Wed Feb 06, 2008 at 07:47 AM
Chuck Norris does not cut his grass,he stares at it and dares it to grow.
Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris can kick you in the back of the face.
Posted by bob in kentucky on Tue Feb 12, 2008 at 01:28 AM
Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris can kick you in the back of the face.
What the hell is a chuck norris?? y'all should be doing better things for your self like getting laid other than saying crap about chuck fuckin norris. tell chuck norris I said HE SUCKS!,
if i don't send another post, then i'm dead... killed by chuck norris
Posted by Toby in Lagos/Nig on Fri Feb 15, 2008 at 03:41 PM
if i don't send another post, then i'm dead... killed by chuck norris
Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors, he is dividable by zero, and he can pull a wheelie on a unicycle. He has two speeds; walk, and kill. At the dawn of time, when God said let there be light, Chuck Norris said "Say please."
Posted by Gman on Wed Feb 20, 2008 at 07:49 AM
God rest all your souls for i believe you all have parished from your trash talk of the man. We know as sir kills'alot. RIP my internet buddies.
Posted by caper on Fri Feb 29, 2008 at 11:18 PM
Elvis imitated chuck norris.
Posted by Jeff in maine on Thu Mar 06, 2008 at 02:15 PM
Chuck Norris watches 60 minutes in 35.
Posted by Jeff in maine on Thu Mar 06, 2008 at 02:17 PM
Chuck Norris' foreskin saved 455 burn victims.
Posted by Jeff in maine on Thu Mar 06, 2008 at 02:19 PM
Chuck Norris ate the cross and shit toothpicks. (for your sins)
Posted by Jeff in maine on Thu Mar 06, 2008 at 02:20 PM
The first thing that popped up when I entered "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" in Google, was of the Bruce Lee film where Chuck had it handed to him by the ORIGINAL bad-ass. Hey now!
Posted by DUde on Mon Mar 10, 2008 at 10:08 AM
Chuck Norris can win a hockey game 8-0.....in OT.
Chuck Norris' hockey team is always on a powerplay because, well, it's Chuck Norris' team.
Posted by Chuck in Chuckville on Wed Mar 12, 2008 at 05:54 PM
Chuck Norris' hockey team is always on a powerplay because, well, it's Chuck Norris' team.
A long time ago, Chuck Norris's great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather punched a raccoon in the eyes, they are still black to this day !
Posted by john Wooder in Canada on Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 04:35 PM
In World WarII Germany heard of Chuck Norris and tryed to clone him.The closest they ever got was Mel Gibson
Posted by Dean Smith on Tue Mar 18, 2008 at 10:31 PM
Chuck Norris can win "The Game"
Posted by Don't Worry 'Bout Me in Juneau, Alaska, USA on Thu Mar 20, 2008 at 10:40 PM
Yo' momma' was so ugly... until Chuck Norris gave her a roundhouse kick in the face; then she became pretty.
Posted by Tara Nicole in San Fran on Sat Mar 22, 2008 at 01:23 PM