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Foot Myths
The Xenna Corporation has issued a press release in which they detail a number of widely circulated myths about feet. These include:
• If a person's second toe is longer than the others, they are dependable, conservative and keep their emotions in check.
• If a person's third toe is bigger than the others, they're hot-headed and have a temper.
• If a person has long toes, they're among the thinkers of the world.
• If a person's feet are wide, they're a hard worker and have strong family values.
• If a person's feet are narrow, they're shy and quiet.
• If a person has webbed feet (a hereditary trait), they're the life of the party and would make a good salesperson or entertainer.
I have incredibly wide feet (size quadruple E), which makes it very hard for me to find shoes that fit. For instance, New Balance are the only brand of sneakers I can wear. None of the other sports-shoe manufacturers, such as Nike, make shoes that will fit mutant feet like mine. According to the myths, this would make me hard working, which I'm reluctant to say is false, though I do have a strong tendency to procrastinate. This entire website is the product of my procrastination.
Of course, Xenna coyly omits the greatest foot myth of all: that there's a relationship between foot size and penile length. This myth was actually investigated by Canadian researchers Jerald Bain and Kerry Siminoski, who published their results in the Annals of Sex Research (vol. 6, no.3, 1993. p.231-5). Using a sample size of 63 men, they determined that there was only a very weak relationship between foot size and penis length. They concluded "there is no practical utility in predicting penis size from foot size or height." Their research won them a 1998 IgNoble prize in the field of Statistics.
• If a person's second toe is longer than the others, they are dependable, conservative and keep their emotions in check.
• If a person's third toe is bigger than the others, they're hot-headed and have a temper.
• If a person has long toes, they're among the thinkers of the world.
• If a person's feet are wide, they're a hard worker and have strong family values.
• If a person's feet are narrow, they're shy and quiet.
• If a person has webbed feet (a hereditary trait), they're the life of the party and would make a good salesperson or entertainer.
I have incredibly wide feet (size quadruple E), which makes it very hard for me to find shoes that fit. For instance, New Balance are the only brand of sneakers I can wear. None of the other sports-shoe manufacturers, such as Nike, make shoes that will fit mutant feet like mine. According to the myths, this would make me hard working, which I'm reluctant to say is false, though I do have a strong tendency to procrastinate. This entire website is the product of my procrastination.
Of course, Xenna coyly omits the greatest foot myth of all: that there's a relationship between foot size and penile length. This myth was actually investigated by Canadian researchers Jerald Bain and Kerry Siminoski, who published their results in the Annals of Sex Research (vol. 6, no.3, 1993. p.231-5). Using a sample size of 63 men, they determined that there was only a very weak relationship between foot size and penis length. They concluded "there is no practical utility in predicting penis size from foot size or height." Their research won them a 1998 IgNoble prize in the field of Statistics.
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Categories: Body Manipulation, Urban Legends Posted by Alex on Wed Aug 02, 2006 |
Comments (25) |
| More from the Hoax Museum Archives: | |||
I have very wide feet for a girl, but I'm not a hard worker at all ... I only have to woor hard at finding shoes that fit -_-'
Posted by Dracul on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 12:33 PM
*work
Posted by Dracul on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 12:33 PM
One that I've heard, and is at least true for me, is that the distance from your wrist to your elbow is roughly equal to your shoe length.
Posted by Daniel on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 01:23 PM
My second toe is longest, but I fly off the handle a lot.
Posted by Meerkat on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 01:30 PM
"...the distance from your wrist to your elbow is roughly equal to your shoe length."
It's true for me and the several people I've told it is so.
They've all been surprised when they confimed it - as was I.
Posted by Peter on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 02:11 PM
It's true for me and the several people I've told it is so.
They've all been surprised when they confimed it - as was I.
Okay, I heard this gross urban legend. This Australian guy bought his girlfriend a giant gold ring he got at half price because it had lumps in it. However, the lumps were where a Sydney Funnel-Web Spider (most poisonous spider in the world)had layed her eggs! They hatched when the girl was asleep and bit her. She died.
Posted by Meerkat on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 02:19 PM
The only statement about correspondence between penis size and that of other body parts that I think is true is that men with bigger overall bodies (I mean height, not weight, silly) have somewhat longer penises. In other words, that appendage, like the other ones (fingers, ears, etc.) is more or less proportionate to the rest of the body.
So since taller people often have bigger feet ...
However, it's also probably true that this correlation, though real, is fairly weak (as is the correlation to hand size, head size, etc.).
I'm about 6'3", in case you were wondering.
Posted by Big Gary in Uncertain, Texas on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 06:00 PM
So since taller people often have bigger feet ...
However, it's also probably true that this correlation, though real, is fairly weak (as is the correlation to hand size, head size, etc.).
I'm about 6'3", in case you were wondering.
Big Gary, is that your length or the length of your...
Posted by LaMa in Europe on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 07:31 PM
Well, I have a feet so big that I guess the only shoes that fit me over here are custom made (no kidding, no one makes shoes in my foot size anymore).
Long toes? I don't have them, but I still think a lot (enough to drive myself up the wall in fact).
My third toe is shorter than my first one (although very close to the same length as the first) and I do flare up from time to time (of course, I'm also under a lot of stress).
As for the rest, I'm not sure, I have rather narrow feet, and I sometimes end up mumbling to myself.
Posted by RAMChYLD in @Work, Malaysia on Wed Aug 02, 2006 at 07:49 PM
Long toes? I don't have them, but I still think a lot (enough to drive myself up the wall in fact).
My third toe is shorter than my first one (although very close to the same length as the first) and I do flare up from time to time (of course, I'm also under a lot of stress).
As for the rest, I'm not sure, I have rather narrow feet, and I sometimes end up mumbling to myself.
wide feet = hard worker and strong family values.
narrow feet = shy and quiet.
I am shy, quiet, hardworking and have strong family values. Does that mean I should have one foot narrow and one foot wide?
Posted by Lou in UK on Thu Aug 03, 2006 at 12:46 AM
narrow feet = shy and quiet.
I am shy, quiet, hardworking and have strong family values. Does that mean I should have one foot narrow and one foot wide?
I have awfully wide feet too, I think it's the German in me. All my Mum's rellies (obviously German) have really wide feet. It makes it so hard to find shoes. I cried for two days while trying to find shoes for my wedding. They just don't make nice white sandals for Big Foot! In the end I squeezed painfully into a pair and then after the ceremony went barefoot.
Alex, you'd have German ancestry as well don't you?
Posted by Nettie in Perth, Western Australia on Thu Aug 03, 2006 at 06:00 AM
Alex, you'd have German ancestry as well don't you?
This sort of belief, and the practice of Fung Shuei lead to Chinese footbinding for women. The idea was not only would making the feet smaller by crushing them up make women shy and queit, it would make other parts of the anatomy small and tight, if you get my drift.
The fact that foot-bound women could not run away from men was a delightful(?) bonus.
Posted by DFStuckey in Auckland New Zealand on Fri Aug 04, 2006 at 10:58 PM
The fact that foot-bound women could not run away from men was a delightful(?) bonus.
Hmmmm, I was told that a longer second toe "meant" you had extra sensory powers. More likely to see ghosts or experience telepathy, that type of thing.
Posted by Pixie in Germany on Sat Aug 05, 2006 at 01:18 AM
I think having a longer second toe means you prefer those outrageously pointy-toed shoes that were in fashion a couple of years ago.
Posted by Big Gary in Plainview, Texas on Sun Aug 06, 2006 at 02:02 PM
My spritual leader told me that if your second toe is longer than any other toe that you are a HOMO. Is this true. PLEASE HELP!!! I AM TRULY CONFUSED.
THANKS,
PAT
Posted by PAT in MIDDLE OF NO WHERE on Wed Aug 16, 2006 at 04:19 PM
THANKS,
PAT
Pat, I suspect you of winding us up here, but since that is no stupider than any of the other myths, somone probably does believe it.
What spiritual system do you belong to? The only religious person I ever heard say anything abou a long second toe was a Wesleyan Brethern girl who claimed it was a sign of genius in a woman. Guess what her feet looked like . . .
Clearly a test is in order, your spiritual leader should be told: Cut off the second toe of a gay person, and see if they degrade to being straight:)
Posted by DFStuckey in Auckland New Zealand on Thu Aug 17, 2006 at 12:31 AM
What spiritual system do you belong to? The only religious person I ever heard say anything abou a long second toe was a Wesleyan Brethern girl who claimed it was a sign of genius in a woman. Guess what her feet looked like . . .
Clearly a test is in order, your spiritual leader should be told: Cut off the second toe of a gay person, and see if they degrade to being straight:)
I have square feet and my toes are perfectly angled. My second toe is shorter then my big toe but longer then my third toe and so on.
Does anyone know what that mean???
Posted by Claudette in WI, USA on Sun Jul 08, 2007 at 11:42 PM
Does anyone know what that mean???
What does it mean when a person has short toes, all of them? My girlfriends toes are shorter than half the length of my toes.
Posted by Fermin Garcia in kuwait on Thu Jul 26, 2007 at 10:46 AM
Well, Fermin, on a practical note, it will mean that she cannot borrow your shoes.
Posted by DFStuckey in Auckland New Zealand on Thu Jul 26, 2007 at 10:22 PM
claudette... email me at
.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
i have some answers for you
Posted by torontogymnast in toronto on Sat Feb 14, 2009 at 03:14 AM
.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
i have some answers for you
i was told f your second toe s longer than your first you are gay, is that true or even a real myth?
Posted by merkin king, on Sun Apr 12, 2009 at 06:27 AM
I totally agree with your theory.
That's some solid advice there.
You have got a great blog going.
Keep it up, I am loving it.
Posted by Dominique in Melbourne on Wed Jun 02, 2010 at 03:49 AM
That's some solid advice there.
You have got a great blog going.
Keep it up, I am loving it.
Well, I kinda agree with what is said above. I have longer 2nd toe and my 3rd toe is really close in length from the 2nd so they look like twins. The rest of the toes are shorter so if you see them they are like an half arch if you know what I mean....
So my question is what does it mean to have twin toes.. ???? Can someone answer this?
Posted by Elle in Planet Earth on Sat Oct 16, 2010 at 09:48 PM
So my question is what does it mean to have twin toes.. ???? Can someone answer this?
My second toe is longer than the others. And the descriptions are true, dependable, conservative and keep emotions in check 
Posted by sha in Philippines on Sun Mar 13, 2011 at 09:06 AM
From my personal experience height is not indication of size. And neither is race.
I know it's a small pool, but just giving details so you can see great variation:
Asian/Jamaican, 5' 11": thick, good length
Puerto Rican/African American, 6' 2" : not thick, below avg or maybe just at it
Dominican, 5' 11": very good thickness and length
Caucasian 6' 3" : avg girth, okay length
My conclusion/new hypothesis: It does not have to do with foot size, hand size, or finger length. I know it may be weird but I have a working hypothesis that toe length might be a good indication- at least in my case if I would've used that as a gage of size it would've been correct. So I hope somebody does a study on this.
Posted by Anna in NY on Thu Oct 25, 2012 at 10:56 PM
I know it's a small pool, but just giving details so you can see great variation:
Asian/Jamaican, 5' 11": thick, good length
Puerto Rican/African American, 6' 2" : not thick, below avg or maybe just at it
Dominican, 5' 11": very good thickness and length
Caucasian 6' 3" : avg girth, okay length
My conclusion/new hypothesis: It does not have to do with foot size, hand size, or finger length. I know it may be weird but I have a working hypothesis that toe length might be a good indication- at least in my case if I would've used that as a gage of size it would've been correct. So I hope somebody does a study on this.
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