Hoax Museum Blog: Religion

Shroud of Turin — BBC News has a good summary of the Shroud of Turin controversy, in light of the second face that was discovered on the backside of it. "Does this mean it is real after all? Or does it mean it's an even better hoax than was previously thought?" The answer: no one really knows. I noted in my book that the debate about the shroud rages on and likely will for the foreseeable future. The emergence of new evidence has simply made that more true than ever.

Weeping Mary Returns — About a year and a half ago I posted an entry about a statue of the Virgin Mary in Perth that was weeping rose-scented tears. Critics and church officials dismissed it as a hoax created by filling the statue with some kind of oil. Now that same statue is back in the news again, crying even more publicly. The Archbishop of Perth has cautioned people that "the case for a miraculous happening has not been proved."

Oprah Becomes 4th Member of Holy Trinity — The major Christian denominations have jointly agreed to make Oprah Winfrey the fourth member of the Holy Trinity, thereby broadening its appeal and making it less gender-biased. "Along with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, the popular talk show host will be recognized as one person in the sacred and indivisible unity of the Godhead--or Quadhead, as the updated Trinity will now be called."

Ted Jesus Christ GOD — Ted Kurts is a humble guy. All he asks is that you recognize that he's the Messiah and the second coming of Jesus Christ. You doubt his claim? You want proof? Then check out his photo to the right. Doesn't he look eerily like certain portrayals of Christ? What better proof could you ask for? Oh, and please don't refer to him as Ted Kurts. It's Ted Jesus Christ God, to you. When I come across sites like this it's hard to know if they're supposed to be taken seriously or not. I kinda suspect Ted is serious. Or maybe not. Who knows. But Ted Jesus Christ God says that anyone who links to his site will be blessed, so if he does turn out to be the real thing, then I've got my bases covered.

The Church of Beer — If you love beer, then this is the church for you: The Church of Beer. It really is a church. If you're ordained as one of its ministers, then you can legitimately perform wedding services. But by its own admission, it doesn't take itself that seriously. I signed up to join right away. I'm even tempted to become an official Church of Beer minister, but I'm not sure about shelling out $15 for the honor.

Church of SpongeBob Squarepants — Are you bored with mainstream religion and ready, eddy, eddy for something different? Then why not consider converting to the Church of SpongeBob Squarepants? In fact, you probably don't even have to give up your existing faith. Spongebob is quite ecumenical, in this regard. To convert all you have to do is "drop on the deck and flop like a fish." (Thanks to Alex... that's someone else named Alex, not me... for the link).

Get a text message from Jesus — Here's a news story from a couple of weeks ago that I missed. This Finnish company promised that if you sent their service a text message prayer, you would receive a response from Jesus Christ himself. And Jesus would only charge the very reasonable price of $1.52 per prayer.

The Jesus Pizza Project — Around the world hungry hackers and coders are about to eat pizza. But the question that vexes them is this: what if there is an image of Jesus hidden in that pizza? Now the JesusPizza Project will harness the power of thousands of computer users, via the miracle of distributed computing, to search images of those pizzas that are about to be eaten, to find out if one of them contains the image of Jesus. Just like the Seti-at-Home project, you download some software. When your computer is in screensaver mode this software goes to work, scanning downloaded images of pizzas. (Thanks to Phil Carmody for the link)

Cheesy Jesus — Behold the power of Cheesus! Cheesus Industries manufactures and sells "premium quality, religious-themed cheese sculptures." That would be statues of Jesus made out of cheese. Of course, there's nothing to stop someone making a statue of Jesus out of cheese and selling it, but in this case there's no way to buy what Cheesus Industries claims to be producing. In reality, Cheesus Industries appears to be a satirical promotional tool for the 'cheesy' lounge singer Richard Cheese.

I See Jesus — Pareidolia is defined as the perception of meaningful images in random patterns. In other words, seeing things that aren't really there. For instance, people might see a face in a cloud. Or they might see the Virgin Mary in the window of a Boston hospital. When people start seeing religious images on the walls or windows of buildings, it almost always leads to good business for the business affected, as massive crowds flock there to see the image. So now there's a company calling itself ISeeJesus.com that will facilitate the appearance of religious images at your place of business via 'special prayer techniques.' How you take advantage of the crowds that will then flock to see the image is up to you.

Diet Holy Water — If you're feeling a little sinful, wash away your sins with some Diet Holy Water. Now, I don't think this is a hoax in the sense that this stuff isn't really for sale. Instead I'm linking to it because it seems like a marketing effort that has tongue firmly in cheek.

LordCo Centre — The religiously inclined can find shops tailored to their needs over at the LordCo Centre Mall. Book a cruise on Noah Cruise Lines, or have all your financial needs taken care of at MeccaBank. (Warning: the site automatically plays obnoxious music).

The Jedi Religion — I wrote in my book about the burgeoning Jedi movement throughout the world. For instance, when the 2001 census was taken in Britain, tens of thousands of people listed 'Jedi Knight' as their religious affiliation on the census forms. I've actually heard from a source in the Office of National Statistics that when the figures were all counted, there ended up being more Jedis than Jews in Britain. Now we have more proof of the growing stature of 'Jediism': the quasi-official website of the Jedi Religion.

Plug n Pray — Here's a product that we need more than ever! It's Plug 'n' Pray. The software kit that easily allows you to convert to a new religion. As the blurb on the website says, "Do you need to change religion to grab the chance for a career outlook? Are you going to work abroad? Getting a new customized god is easy with Plug'n'Pray. A new spirituality and a new respectability can be yours at a mouse click." I especially like the 'Switch Kits' available in the Palestine and Ulster editions. These offer two religions conveniently packaged in one kit. Again, as the website explains: "Are you on the border where religious communities mix and discrimination rages? Switch religion with the Plug'n'Pray Switch Edition and choose the most convenient one for your present situation." (Thanks to Richard for the link).

Jesus Face — Face of Jesus seen in ozone hole (via Liquito).

Mother Teresa Hoax — Rationalists describe Mother Teresa's miraculous cure of Monica Besra's abdominal tumor as a hoax.

The Nature of Reality — Interesting discussion of the nature of reality. Posits three positions: 1) Reality is hidden and unknowable; 2) Reality is attainable; 3) We can't agree about reality. (via RealityCarnival).

Jesus Freakin — Here's a curious website just sent in by a visitor: JesusFreakin.com. It's the homepage for a new role-playing game in which you get to play Jesus Christ, who's just returned after 2000 years and is ready for revenge. The game has tag lines such as 'The time has come to thin the flock,' and 'After 2000 years, he's ready to cast the first stone.' In my opinion, it's definitely a hoax. First of all, the site and graphics are pretty amateurish, given that it's supposedly produced by a video game company (Last Stone Studios). Second, there's no evidence that this company exists. It lists a business address on a press release it issued, but this address is just a p.o. box at a Mail Boxes etc. Finally, just reading through the site, it seems pretty obvious that it's satire. But the website does link to a CafePress page where you can buy Jesus Freakin merchandise. My guess is that whoever created the site is trying to be controversial as a ploy to sell a few t-shirts.

Afterlife Telegrams — Afterlife Telegrams: Terminally ill volunteers will memorize your messages and, upon death, deliver them to your friends and family on the other side

We Want Your Soul! — Cute hoax website: WeWantYourSoul.com. Though it's more of a spoof than a hoax, I'd say, since I don't think anyone is actually going to believe they're going to get money out of this.