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pretty bad jokes
Posted: 15 August 2005 12:36 PM   [ Ignore ]
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1. Two peanuts were walking down a spooky road at night…  One was assaulted.


2. A termite walks into a bar room and asks, “Is the bar tender here?”


3. “Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud.”
“Yes sir, it’s fresh ground.”


4. What’s brown and sticky?  A stick.


5. Why are proctologists so gloomy?
They always have the end in sight.


6. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin’ Catholic.


7. What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing stupid, apples don’t talk.


8. What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him out for a drag.


9. Why can’t a chicken coop have more than 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan.


10. Famous last words of a mafia hitman: “Who put the violin in the violin case?”

Told you they were bad… as taken from http://www.jokes2go.com/lists/list15.html

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Posted: 15 August 2005 12:42 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
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oops, missed half the list!

11. How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?


12. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.


13. What’s brown and sounds like a bell?  Dung.


14. What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A private tutor.


15. What do you call spending the afternoon with a cranky rabbit?
A bad hare day.


16. Have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower?
That’s because he hides well.


17. What was the centerpiece of the annual
Anorexia and Bulimnia sufferers convention?
A cake jumping out of a girl.


18. Where do kings keep their armies?
In their sleevies.


19. Why don’t anteaters get sick?
Because they’re full of anty-bodies.

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If you can’t handle someone at their worst,

You don’t deserve them at their best.

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Posted: 15 August 2005 10:24 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]
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grin

And you weren’t kidding were you???

tongue laugh

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Canadian Bacon Rules !!!

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Posted: 21 August 2005 03:46 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]
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An Englishman, Irishman & Scotsman walked into a pub.  The bartender asks “is this a joke?”

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Remember, a Dragon is for life!

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Posted: 21 August 2005 09:34 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]
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The Energizer Bunny was arrested yesterday.
- He was charged with battery.

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I’m loving the puppies.

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Posted: 21 August 2005 03:31 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]
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theres 2 muffins in an oven. one muffin goes, “oh crap, its getting hot in here.” the other muffin says “oh crap, a talking muffin.”

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“This is the last time you’ll whack your Willy in school again!”

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Posted: 25 August 2005 04:26 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 6 ]
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RAMONESxMANIA - 21 August 2005 07:31 PM

theres 2 muffins in an oven. one muffin goes, “oh crap, its getting hot in here.” the other muffin says “oh crap, a talking muffin.”

That one I like!

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Posted: 30 August 2005 12:01 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 7 ]
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I love bad jokes! But then I am very easily amused

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“Do you realise the sun doesnt go down, its just an illusion caused by the world spinning round”

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Posted: 09 September 2005 02:00 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 8 ]
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Archimedes:  “Eureka!”
Passerby:  “Well, you don’t smell too great, yourself!”

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“If any man wish to write in a clear style, let him be first clear in his thoughts.”

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Posted: 09 September 2005 03:06 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 9 ]
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A guy went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I’m a teepee, then I’m a wigwam, then I’m a teepee, and then I’m a wigwam. It’s driving me crazy. What’s wrong with me?”

The doctor replied, “It’s very simple. You’re two tents.”

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Posted: 09 September 2005 03:08 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 10 ]
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Patient : Doctor, it hurts when I do this!

Doctor : Then don’t do that.

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Heaven must be really boring, if you think about it logically.
All the angels must be snoring.  Who could stand perfection for eternity?

Not me. - George Hrab

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Posted: 09 September 2005 03:12 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 11 ]
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Doctor : I have some bad news and some very bad news.

Patient : Well, might as well give me the bad news first.

Doctor : The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.

Patient : 24 HOURS! Thats terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What’s the very bad news?

Doctor : I’ve been trying to reach you since yesterday.

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Heaven must be really boring, if you think about it logically.
All the angels must be snoring.  Who could stand perfection for eternity?

Not me. - George Hrab

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