There is a great deal of things I know that, believe me, I don’t *want* to know. The damn things have a habit of hiding behind my high school civics lessons and refusing to come out, even when bribed with conversational trivia.

I’ve always wondered, can’t you use something like a corkscrew to get it out? Seriously   I mean, how do they do it at the hospital? Call in the big nurse with the long-sleeved glove?

FrostBird - 13 November 2008 02:45 PM

I’ve always wondered, can’t you use something like a corkscrew to get it out? Seriously   I mean, how do they do it at the hospital? Call in the big nurse with the long-sleeved glove?

Ummmm. . .do you really want to have somebody shoving a sharp pointy twisty object up there? 

Accipiter - 13 November 2008 02:50 PM

FrostBird - 13 November 2008 02:45 PM

I’ve always wondered, can’t you use something like a corkscrew to get it out? Seriously   I mean, how do they do it at the hospital? Call in the big nurse with the long-sleeved glove?

Ummmm. . .do you really want to have somebody shoving a sharp pointy twisty object up there? 

And if you do, *PLEASE* do *NOT* tell us about it..

Maybe they cooked it with microwaves added some butter and DING, out pops a baked potato!

Like Dr. House says in the tv show, people lie.  Medical personnel will talk about you (at the very least) among each other despite privacy laws and ethics and the like.  If this guy had told the truth, it may not have gotten outside a small group of people

Years ago I attended one of those house parties for intimate ‘toys’.  I hadn’t known what to expect really since it was announced pretty much like a Tupperware party was.  Anyway, among other most interesting objects were a few actually meant for that area of the anatomy.  The woman selling the objects did make one thing very clear, that the bum is actually a sort of vacuum and objects put into that area have a tendency to be further sucked inward.  For that reason, all the ‘toys’ that might be used that way had a kind of safety bar that would prevent them from traveling too far inward.

***.....okay, that was a difficult thing to phrase…...***

Yep. Most such widgets have wide bases, some of which are suction cups, so you can apply them to a floor (or to your forehead, if you’re feeling very, very silly).

I can tell you, there are some seriously wierd people out there, and even wierder toys built to their tastes.. One of those little tidbits of information I have lodged in my brain is a zoophile toys website, where one can buy anatomically-correct toys molded from various animals. Yes, you too can be the proud owner of a translucent yellow-green, three foot long horse wang.

I think if I’m ever rich, I’ll get one in hard plastic, just to turn it into a lamp. Great conversation piece.

Not sure I would like to engage in whatever conversation that might trigger…

Hmm. Good point. A ‘lack of conversation’ piece, then.. a ‘pointedly avoiding conversation about it’ piece.

Edited.
Nothing to see here.