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“Save your child from being a goth”, says church
Posted: 31 August 2007 03:43 PM   [ Ignore ]
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Okay, someone was speaking about this on youtube and then I found it on http://www.eryc.co.uk/forum/topic2008.html
It angerd and made me laugh at the same time.

* This was handed out to parents by a church *

Is Your Child a Goth? Presented by St. Mary’s Church

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that
young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer,
and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan’s temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child.

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup,lipstick or nail polish.

-Wears any odd silver jewelry or symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.(This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates.

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: “I’m so gothic, I’m dead”, “woe is me”, “I’m a goth”.

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary’s Catholic Church

I think this is ridicules, Christianity is supposed to be built on understanding others, not hating them just because you don’t understand them.

I hope I spelled it right this time downer

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:47 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
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nameless - 31 August 2007 07:43 PM

I think this is reticules

LOL

(Yes, I know this is one was the spellchecker.)

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:48 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]
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I also think it’s reticules.  Somthagn needs to be dun to stop tehse christuns.

This has been around for a while.  It also applies to c. 99% of the teenage kids out there.  If there were that many goths running around I’m sure the government would have opened a hunting season on them by now.

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Heaven must be really boring, if you think about it logically.
All the angels must be snoring.  Who could stand perfection for eternity?

Not me. - George Hrab

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:49 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]
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David B. - 31 August 2007 07:47 PM
nameless - 31 August 2007 07:43 PM

I think this is reticules

LOL

(Yes, I know this is one was the spellchecker.)

I hate you blank stare

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:50 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]
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And myy daughter wasn’t born into a germanic tribe sometime before the 6th century AD, so I think I’m safe.

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:52 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]
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David B. - 31 August 2007 07:50 PM

And myy daughter wasn’t born into a germanic tribe sometime before the 6th century AD, so I think I’m safe.

I think there’s a universal law that every post making fun of bad spelling either contains or precedes a spelling mistake by the poster.
red face

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:53 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 6 ]
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David B. - 31 August 2007 07:50 PM

And myy daughter wasn’t born into a germanic tribe sometime before the 6th century AD, so I think I’m safe.

LOL

Does your son masturbate? Yes? Thought so! Then he is a goth and is possessed by Satan! Seek therapy NOW! tongue laugh

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:54 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 7 ]
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David B. - 31 August 2007 07:52 PM
David B. - 31 August 2007 07:50 PM

And myy daughter wasn’t born into a germanic tribe sometime before the 6th century AD, so I think I’m safe.

I think there’s a universal law that every post making fun of bad spelling either contains or precedes a spelling mistake by the poster.
red face

Calmer?

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:55 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 8 ]
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-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

*shoots self*

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Heaven must be really boring, if you think about it logically.
All the angels must be snoring.  Who could stand perfection for eternity?

Not me. - George Hrab

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:56 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 9 ]
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-Expresses an interest in sex.

Nope, never known a teenager who was interested in sex.

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Heaven must be really boring, if you think about it logically.
All the angels must be snoring.  Who could stand perfection for eternity?

Not me. - George Hrab

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:56 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 10 ]
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But I honestly think this one was the best!
LOL
“-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)”

... Appart from masturbating and the sleeping thing tongue laugh

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Posted: 31 August 2007 03:56 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 11 ]
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Goth or no, I would say some of the listed symptoms would definitely be cause for concern. No? I really couldn’t blame a parent for being a bit worried if his kid wore black all the time, talked about suicide, and practiced self-multilation.

By the way, do we actually know that this was passed out at “a church”? I can imagine churches that might do such a thing, but that doesn’t mean they actually did. I don’t know how many “St. Mary’s” churches there are, but a rough estimate would be “lots and lots.”

And Nameless, “reticules” is one of your misspellings that I just adore—really! You probably don’t get the joke, but that’s because someone of your age and gender has little chance of knowing that reticule is an old-fashioned name for a lady’s purse.

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