Jokes I sent to my 11 year old nephew
Posted: 03 August 2007 11:53 PM   [ Ignore ]
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I found these by googling.  I hope they are appropriate for an 11 year old.  He just got his first email address:


What is Beethoven doing in his grave?

Decomposing! (submitted by Gabby)

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What do you call a one legged lady?

Eileen! (submitted by Nick)

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What is the difference between boogers & broccoli?

Kids don’t eat broccoli! (submitted by Emily Schafer)   LOL

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How do you make a kleenex dance?

Put a little boogie in it!

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My friend is built upside down…

His nose runs, and his feet smell! (submitted by my Daddy)

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Space…..it seems to go on and on forever, but then you get to the end and the gorrilla starts throwing barrels at you. - Phlip J. Fry

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:00 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
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Bebelicious - 04 August 2007 03:53 AM

I found these by googling.  I hope they are appropriate for an 11 year old.  He just got his first email address:

What do you call a woman with no arms or legs on a bar-b-que grill?

Patty! (submitted by Joe)

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on a bar-b-que grill?

Frank! (submitted by Joe)

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in your mailbox?

Bill! (submitted by Annette S.)

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

Because it wanted to get to the bottom! (submitted by Kelsey, New Plymouth, New Zealand)

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Did you hear about the Indian chief who drank 15 cups of tea before bed-time?

That night he drown in his tea-pee! (submitted by mommylee)

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Why did the boy bring toilet paper to the birthday party?

Because he’s a party pooper! (submitted by Jackson Kahl)

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What’s grosser than gross?

Eating raisin bran when your brother can’t find his scab collection! (submitted by Katie)

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Why don’t elephants pick their nose?

They don’t know where to hide a 30 pound booger! (submitted by Jacob Luedecke)

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who lives in a bush?

Russell! (submitted by A.M.)

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What do you call a man with no legs?

Neil! (submitted by Tails)

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If you go into the bathroom an American & come out Japanese, what are you while you’re in the bathroom?

European! (submitted by Rachael)

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What do you call a guy who was born in New York, married in Florida, and died in Ohio?

Dead! (submitted by sabina)

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Did you hear the joke about the fart?

You don’t want to, it stinks! (submitted by Jessica)

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What is black and white and red all over?

A nun in a blender! (submitted by TABE)

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall?

Art! (submitted by Josh)

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Why did the umpire bring toilet paper to the game?

Because the bases were loaded! (submitted by Rachelle)

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What is invisible and smells like a banana?

A monkey’s fart! (submitted by Buffy)

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What is red & green and goes 300 miles an hour?

A frog in a blender! (submitted by Payton Burgess)

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs swimming in a pool?

Bob! (submitted by Katie & Lizzy)

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Where does dragon milk come from?

A cow with no legs! (submitted by Shanda)

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What is the last thing to go through a bug’s mind before he hits the windshield?

His butt! (submitted by Tator Tot)

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What is grosser than gross?

Falling off the Empire State Building & getting your eyelid caught on a nail! (submitted by Michael Clark)

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs at your doorstep?

Matt! (submitted by jam)

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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea-weed! (submitted by Seth)

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head?

Doug! (submitted by Dave)

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What do you call a man without a spade in his head?

Douglas! (submitted by Dave)

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What do you call a dog with no legs?

Doesn’t matter, he can’t come anyways! (submitted by Wesley Wickersham)

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Who likes nasty things better, a frog or the son of a supermarket owner?

The son, he’s a little grocer! (submitted by Cuban Playaz)

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Why does a gorilla have big nostrils?

Because it has big fingers! (submitted by Rhino)

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What did Data see in the toilet?

The Captain’s log! (submitted

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Space…..it seems to go on and on forever, but then you get to the end and the gorrilla starts throwing barrels at you. - Phlip J. Fry

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:01 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]
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What’s got two legs and bleeds profusely?

Half a cat.


Trust me, a few drinks in anyone and they’ll piss themselves at that one. NOT good to tell at animal rights rallies. Over a megaphone.

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:02 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]
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Bebelicious - 04 August 2007 03:53 AM

What is invisible and smells like a banana?

A monkey’s fart! (submitted by Buffy)


What is Beethoven doing in his grave?

Decomposing! (submitted by Gabby)

LOL
These are definitely my favourites!

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:10 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]
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I would say all of those are appropriate for an 11 year old. *Thumbs up*

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:29 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]
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The “put a little boogie in it” Kleenex joke has been an all time favourite of mine since I was little. Second only to the Star Trek one, except when I heard it , it was Spock, not Data. Guess I’m old.

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Posted: 04 August 2007 12:37 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 6 ]
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Those look awesome Bebelicious

Except, you’re missing my favorite

What do you call two guys sitting on top of a window holding a blanket?

Kurt and Rod

smile

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Posted: 04 August 2007 06:00 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 7 ]
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I have a joke

why did Mozart give away his chickens?


because all they said was bach bach bach.

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Posted: 04 August 2007 09:01 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 8 ]
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thanks,

I’ll send him the rest.  He’s got a great sense of humor!

Bebe

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Space…..it seems to go on and on forever, but then you get to the end and the gorrilla starts throwing barrels at you. - Phlip J. Fry

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Posted: 05 August 2007 03:34 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 9 ]
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If you go into the bathroom an American & come out Japanese, what are you while you

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Posted: 05 August 2007 11:44 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 10 ]
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Emidawg - 05 August 2007 07:34 AM

If you go into the bathroom an American & come out Japanese, what are you while you

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“We look to Scotland for all our ideas of civilisation.”
- Voltaire

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