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Nun Jokes.
Posted: 20 September 2005 04:15 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 34 ]
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thunderstruck - 20 September 2005 07:50 PM

LaMa, that pic’s funny! where did ya get it? If you dont mind spilling your innermost secrets smile

Puree Soiree

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———
The Kruger-Dunning effect is rampant on internet fora.
J. Kruger & D. Dunning (1999), Unskilled and unaware of it: how difficulties in recognizing one’s own incompetence lead to inflated self-assessments. J Pers Soc Psychol. 77, 1121-1134

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Posted: 20 September 2005 04:17 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 35 ]
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cool, I’ll check the link later! cheers!

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If you can’t handle someone at their worst,

You don’t deserve them at their best.

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Posted: 24 September 2005 11:13 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 36 ]
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Pat is not feeling very well and he decides to go to a doctor.

While he is waiting in the doctor’s reception room, a nun comes out of the doctor’s office. She looks very ashen, drawn and haggard.

Pat goes into the doctor’s office and says to the doctor: “I just saw a nun leaving who looked absolutely terrible. I have never seen a woman look worse.”

The doctor says: “I just told her that she is pregnant.”

Pat exclaims: “Oh my, is she?”

The doctor responds: “No, but it sure cured her hiccups.”

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The Middleman: (drinking milk) You know, that was some darn fine cow squirt.

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Posted: 28 September 2005 01:29 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 37 ]
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Not a joke but a true nun story that happened to me.

I was driving through a very posh neighborhood in Vancouver, British Columbia. There was a Mercedes Benz coming toward me in the other lane. As it passed I was shocked to see it was driven by a nun. Now this really is upper class, I thought. Even a nun drives a Mercedes around here. A few minutes later, I stopped at an intersection. On the corner were some people wearing funny costumes. Then it hit me. Today was October 31.  I don’t know about other places, but on Halloween in Vancouver, many people wear their costumes to work to celebrate the occasion. That would explain the nun in the Mercedes. I had a good laugh the rest of the way home!

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Alas, to wear the mantle of Galileo it is not enough that you be persecuted by an unkind establishment, you must also be right.
-Robert Park

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Posted: 05 December 2005 06:59 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 38 ]
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Thunderstruck - 09 August 2005 02:26 PM

i dont get this one:
Two nuns are sharing a bath to save water

One says

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I could work harder if they would pay me more. excaim

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Posted: 05 December 2005 01:37 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 39 ]
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Thanks Jordan!


I’m still not close, I’m still too dumb to geddit.
I’m sure I’ll understand in a few hours raspberry

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If you can’t handle someone at their worst,

You don’t deserve them at their best.

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Posted: 05 December 2005 06:27 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 40 ]
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Sharruma - 19 August 2005 08:34 AM

When Sister Marlena entered the Monastery of Silence, the Abbot said, “Sister, this is a silent monastery. You are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so.” Sister Marlena lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Abbot said to her, “Sister Marlena, you have been here for 5 years you can speak two words.” Sister Marlena said, “Hard bed.” I’m sorry to hear that,” the Abbot said, “We will get you a better bed.” After another 5 years, the Abbot called Sister Marlena into his office. “You may say another two words, Sister Marlena.” “Cold food,” said Sister Marlena. The Abbott assured her that the food would be better in the future.  On her 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Abbott again called Sister Marlena into his office. “Two words you may say today.”  “I quit,” said Sister Marlena. “It is probably best,”  said the Abbott, “You’ve done nothing but bitch since you got here”.

That made up for the last one.

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Soldier: This is the worst part. The calm before the battle.
Fry: And then the battle is not so bad?
Soldier: Oh, right. I forgot about the battle.

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Posted: 05 December 2005 06:30 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 41 ]
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JordanMan - 05 December 2005 11:59 AM
Thunderstruck - 09 August 2005 02:26 PM

i dont get this one:
Two nuns are sharing a bath to save water

One says

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Soldier: This is the worst part. The calm before the battle.
Fry: And then the battle is not so bad?
Soldier: Oh, right. I forgot about the battle.

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Posted: 05 December 2005 07:33 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 42 ]
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Now, now!  Let’s have nun of that sort of thing here!  This is a public forum, and we don’t want to encourage people to get into such habits!

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“If any man wish to write in a clear style, let him be first clear in his thoughts.”

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Posted: 20 December 2005 08:51 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 43 ]
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A priest and a nun were crossing a desert on a camel. It was a very stubborn camel with a mind and a will of its own. Smack in the middle of the desert, the camel decided to go on strike. No amount of cajoling or kicking by the priest can convince the camel to get up and continue the journey. At last, the nun said to let her try. She went round the camel a few times and then bent down between its legs. All at once, the camel let go a mighty scream and charged down the road. “What in heavens did you do?”, asked the priest. “I don’t know. I saw this thing hanging between his legs and I gave it a bite.”

The priest quickly dropped his pants and said, “You better have a bite at mine then, because sure as hell, I’ve got to go after that bastard.”

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Every man is looking for his ideal woman; meanwhile he gets married.

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Posted: 23 December 2005 11:03 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 44 ]
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lol beamer, funny LOL

o_o I feel so stupid….

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If you can’t handle someone at their worst,

You don’t deserve them at their best.

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