A woman has a close male friend.
This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend.
This always starts out with, ‘You’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way’.
This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying ‘You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you.
We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. We’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you.
We will call you from time to time though, to complain about the person that we hired’.

You it that one pretty much on the head, Tobe.  

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

A woman has a close male friend.

Translation for the ladies:  Some guy she would never be romantically interested in in a thousand years introduces himself at work/campus/whatever and is very friendly leading her to believe this nice guy wants to be her friend when in actuality, he wants to get in her pants because she’s pretty.

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much.

Translation for the ladies:  She’s pretty.

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

  She sees him strictly as a friend.

Translation for the ladies:  She’s pretty and could have her pick of anybody and he’s not in the top 10.

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

This always starts out with, ‘You’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way’.

Translation for the ladies:  He’s thinking, “why aren’t the pretty girls interested in me?”

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

  This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying ‘You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you.

Translation for the ladies:  “Look, we’re trying to let you down easy here.  You are so not qualified that it’s ridiculous.  Get some decent close, a haircut, and develop a few more social skills.  We have nothing in common.  You only want to go out with me because I’m pretty.”

Tobester - 24 August 2009 03:30 PM

We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. We’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you.
We will call you from time to time though, to complain about the person that we hired’.

Translation for the ladies:  “Maybe if I build your self-esteem up a little and tell you how “great” you are and downplay my boyfriend a little, you’ll get the confidence to go out there and find somebody you’re actually compatible with whether she’s pretty or not.”

I agree much more with Bebe’s version.

*high-fives Bebe*

Okay, Bebe (and the rest of you ladies agreeing), men are stupid.  You know that.  Men are not going to see things the same way you do.  Men are not going to see the subtleties you seem to be implying.

So you can’t be honest with the guy and just tell him that stuff?  Trying to let him down easy is fine and dandy.  But when it continues to such a degree and you continue to string him along and not tell him the truth straight out then it just becomes cruel and using him for your own reasons.

Funny.  Men don’t seem to have much trouble with telling women those types of things…

Regardless, I found both versions there humorous.

I don’t know, Tah. I think it’s more common for men to use false flattery etc. just to get in a girl’s knickers.

I thought they were both fairly funny anyway.

Tah - 24 August 2009 08:19 PM

Okay, Bebe (and the rest of you ladies agreeing), men are stupid.  You know that.  Men are not going to see things the same way you do.  Men are not going to see the subtleties you seem to be implying.

So you can’t be honest with the guy and just tell him that stuff?  Trying to let him down easy is fine and dandy.  But when it continues to such a degree and you continue to string him along and not tell him the truth straight out then it just becomes cruel and using him for your own reasons.

I gotta say… I have an ex that just couldn’t handle it, even straight.  His best friend told me that just saying it out loud to him straight won’t do it.  I had to cut off all contact.  (You know when he said it?  The night before he himself left for active duty in South Korea.  Ouch.)  Even that didn’t work.  My ex still had my cell number (why should I change it for one whiny emo-boy?) and sure I can ignore some of the calls and such, but…  He seems to have finally gotten the hint.

Guys can play the subtle game too.  Afterwards, he’d call me up and complain about his current girlfriend.  Difference is, I didn’t care. 

Funny.  Men don’t seem to have much trouble with telling women those types of things…

Then there are a lot of guys you’ve never met, and they all seem to live around here.

Regardless, I found both versions there humorous.

I concur!

Madmouse - 24 August 2009 08:22 PM

I think it’s more common for men to use false flattery etc. just to get in a girl’s knickers.

Hey, now.  We also use true flattery for that purpose, too. 

Ahdora - 24 August 2009 08:41 PM

I gotta say… I have an ex that just couldn’t handle it, even straight.

Fine and dandy.  But you also weren’t playing the “let’s just be friends” card from the start.  You were in a relationship and ending that relationship.

Then there are a lot of guys you

Tah - 24 August 2009 08:19 PM

Okay, Bebe (and the rest of you ladies agreeing), men are stupid.  You know that.  Men are not going to see things the same way you do.  Men are not going to see the subtleties you seem to be implying.

Chill man, it’s just a joke. 
When one is captivated by beauty, whether male or female, rational thought goes out the window.

Bebelicious - 25 August 2009 12:15 AM

When one is captivated by beauty, whether male or female, rational thought goes out the window.

So that explains the large number of raving nutters we’ve had around this Forum!