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Joke: Physician’s Comments
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Posted By:
Alex
in San Diego
Apr 19, 2005
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I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab test, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"
He asked, "well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer or wine?" "Oh no", I replied. "I've never done either."
Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?" I said, "No, I heard that all red meat is very unhealthy."
"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf / sailing / ballooning / motorcycling / rock climbing?" "No I don't", I said.
He said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or sexually fool around?" "No", I said. "I have never done any of those things."
He looked at me and said, "Then why do you give a shit if you live to be 80?"
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Comments
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Page 1 of 4 pages 1 2 3 > Last › |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:15 PM
Thats what I have always thought. |
Maegan
in Tampa, FL - USA
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:20 PM
Cute! |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:27 PM
Well, let's see if I'm having fun: 1)I don't smoke tobacco, and I don't drink alcohol. 2)I minimize my red meat intake, as it's hard for me to digest, and makes me fart. 3)I try to limit my direct exposure to the sun, after having gotten several exreme sunburns as a kid, butI do spend as much time outside as possible (see fart reference). 4) I don't gamble, I hate being in/on vehicles (except for my bicycles), and I rarely have sex (don't ask). Hmmmm... KILL ME NOW |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:31 PM
Dude!!!!! No wonder you have an ATTITUDE!!!!
This is where the phrase, "You need to get out more" comes from..... |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:34 PM
ATTITUDE? (your caps) Kiss my ass, spud |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:36 PM
"You need to get out more often"... this from a guy in a tin can... what's your expiration date, Sir Stubbie? I can't wait |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:43 PM
See What I mean!!!!! |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:45 PM
you're just cranky cuz I rifled thru your desk a couple of weekends ago. Don't make me do it again. BTW, that shirt you're wearing is has KICK ME written all over it (figuratively, not literally, so stop trying to look) |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:47 PM
One of these days, I'll try and figure out what in the world that means..... |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:47 PM
You're the only one on this site who cheeses me off, Sir Loins. I save my attiDude just for you. Isn't that special? |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:51 PM
What else is new!!! |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:55 PM
At times I think you might be an OK kinda guy, other times, you sound like a computer geek that sit's infront of the moniter all day long with his hands down his pants.....Which side of the fence do you live on man????
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Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 01:58 PM
That does it. I'm going thru your desk again, and this time, I'm burning your Britney Spears fan club membership card. And don't even think of editing me, you power-mad putz |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:00 PM
Oh Yeah!!! I'm gonna publish the photo of your mom blowing an Indian!!!! |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:01 PM
Or was that you?????Hmmmmm |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:05 PM
My mother? ahem... Stephen: @#$%^&*(*$%@%^@!@$%@$#^*&$%@#%*^#!@$^*(# and the horse who rode in on you |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:10 PM
MY GOD!!! You really are a geek! I didn't want to believe it, but hell, the evidence is right here.
You dissapoint me......Your outa your league here junior. 
Time to start applying the brakes guy! |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:12 PM
Im just mess'n with ya junior....Your not bad at all. |
Hairy Houdini
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:13 PM
you'd better get back to work, Stephen. The fat guy wants to supersize it, and you're low on fries |
X
in McKinney, TX
Member
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Posted: Tue Apr 19, 2005 | 02:14 PM
Wha.....What tha hell does that mean???? Are you high or something???? If your gonna Thrash me, at least make sense, or it stops here. |
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Note: This thread is located in the Old Forum of the Museum of Hoaxes.
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