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Jokes: Some of My Favorite Bumper Stickers!
Posted By:
X
in McKinney, TX
Apr 06, 2005
 * WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
* BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
* The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.
* IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
* Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
* Where there's a will...I want to be on it.
* Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
* Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
* Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else.
* Honk If You Want To See My Finger.
* Save Your Breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date!
* Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal.
* My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.

Category: Puzzles-Jokes-Riddles; Replies: 61

Comments
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Maegan
in Tampa, FL - USA
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 06:36 AM
...As a side note:

I wasn't allowed to put stickers on my car when I was a teen. I don't do it now...but it's probably b/c it came with stickers.
Just a random guy
in in a hospital, out of a long coma
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 08:34 AM
Help save the environment, send BUSH back to texas. tongue laugh
Just a random guy
in in a hospital, out of a long coma
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 08:34 AM
err, meant to put an a there before bush, but it didnt show up lol
andychrist
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 09:10 AM
Emanuel Kant but Kubla khan


Jesus Saves but Moses Invests... and the Mongol Hords


Never again! That's what I always say


My other car is a pile of **** too.


Quality is Our Slogan



And my favorite, unintentionally funny (if frighteningly clueless) bumper sticker:


Don't you think it's a little bit hypocritical to be for abortion after you yourself have been born?
Nettie
in Perth, Western Australia
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 09:19 AM
Be alert, your country needs lerts!
Nettie
in Perth, Western Australia
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 09:21 AM
This isn't quite a bumper sticker but an sms my mother sent to my husband.

The australian government has recently declared your birth to be an accident. Please report to the nearest hospital to be put down.

And, yes they get along well!
Nettie
in Perth, Western Australia
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 09:21 AM
Hell was so full, I came back!
X
in McKinney, TX
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 10:04 AM
Everything I need to know about life I've learned from reading banned books.

From the looks of my car you would think I reached rock bottom, I started to dig.

God created liquor to keep the Irish from conquering the world
X
in McKinney, TX
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 10:07 AM
Work Harder!!
Millions on Welfare depend on you!
X
in McKinney, TX
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 10:12 AM
Smile. It's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
Maegan
in Tampa, FL - USA
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 10:16 AM
My brother has the Irish one on his car...tehe.

I had one that I never used:

My other car is the Batmobile.

--
My honor student beat up your honor student.
Silent Fish
in an endless forest of wooden chairs
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 11:32 AM
I may not always be right but I'm never wrong!

the one who laughs last thinks slowest

I have not failed, I've just found 10,000 ways that don't work

one by one the penguins steal my sanity

I only please one person perday todays not your day tomarrow doesn't look good either

13 out of 9 people don't understand fractions
Winona
in USA
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 11:37 AM
The one I have on my car is:

Be nice to geeks, chances are you'll be working for one someday.
Myst
Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 02:37 PM
We are the people your parents warned you about.

That one should be the forum motto! LOL
Hairy Houdini
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 02:57 PM
I must look like the main character from some children's television mystery show, or something... whenever I go out and pass families with small kids in the market. the Kids and Mom start whispering "Stranger Danger", in some Rote, Pavlovian chant... I guess this Mr. Danger is like the Top Dog, the Big Kahuna. I try to introduce myself, not wanting to be mistaken for someone I'm not (like Ricky Martin- I get that A LOT), but the kids and Mom just shreik, overcome by my faux celebrity, and run off repeating their mantra... The old people just hold their purses closer to them- I must give them a Thrill Chill
andychrist
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 04:05 PM
Uh-huh.


And making its triumphant return from 1977:

FECK OPUC
Mark-N-Isa
in Midwest USA
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 04:28 PM
Got one when I first return from the Gulf in 1991 that was...

FUQ IRAQ
Smerk
in to mischief
 Member
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 07:45 PM
Stephen's reminded me of this one:
Smile, it makes people wonder what you've been up to...
Sharruma
Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2005 | 09:26 PM
I have the samer problem as Hairy
Except people keep confusing me with Arnie

I think it's the M60
andychrist
Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2005 | 12:15 PM
Uhm... Uh-huh.


You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Only Talk To Me!
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