New Forum | Museum of Hoaxes | Login | Register as a Member | Search

Chimp Attack; Man’s Testicles and foot were severed!! OUCH!!!
Posted By:
X
Mar 04, 2005

I used to want a monkey.

BAKERSFIELD, Calif. Mar 4, 2005 — A couple's plans for a birthday party for their former pet chimpanzee turned tragic when two other chimps at an animal sanctuary escaped from their cage and attacked. The man was critically injured with massive wounds to his face, body and limbs, and the attacking animals were shot dead.

The couple had brought Moe a cake and were standing outside his cage when Buddy and Ollie, two of four chimpanzees in the adjoining cage, attacked St. James Davis, Martarano said. Officials have not determined how the chimps got out of their enclosure, he said.

St. James Davis had severe facial injuries and would require extensive surgery in an attempt to reattach his nose, Dr. Maureen Martin of Kern Medical Center told KGET-TV of Bakersfield. His testicles and a foot also were severed, Kern County Sheriff's Cmdr. Hal Chealander told The Bakersfield Californian.

THATS A BAD MONKEY!!!!!

Full Story: null
Category: News-Story; Replies: 12

Comments
Listed in chronological order. Newest comments at the end.
Page 1 of 1 pages
winona
Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 | 06:03 PM
UGH!
Alex
in San Diego
Member
Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 | 06:45 PM
Yeah, those chimps may look harmless, but they're primates... and we primates can be vicious.

And this is an unrelated thought... but I think I'd rather lose an arm or a leg than my nose.
LaMa
in Europe
Member
Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 | 02:12 AM
Quote:
"And this is an unrelated thought... but I think I'd rather lose an arm or a leg than my nose."

Or my testicles.....
LaMa
in Europe
Member
Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 | 02:13 AM
By the way, Chimps are very violent in the wild. They even have something akin to downright warfare, killing for thhe killing. They are quite like humans indeed.....
LaMa
in Europe
Member
Posted: Sat Mar 05, 2005 | 02:16 AM
Should explain the latter perhaps. They sometimes go on a sort of commando-raid to a neighbouring group. Seek out another chimp of that group, and kill him. It is all premidiated. Chimps are normally very nnoisy when fouraginng; but on such a raid, they are very quite...

"be vewy vewy quit: I'm hunting a chimp, hehe he" (for all you looney tunes fans...!)
thunder
in England
Member
Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2005 | 08:46 AM
I'd rather have my left arm from the elbow down removed. Interesting talking point and you could casually bring up how it happened when weak stomached people are eating.

Or maybe my ear.....
José Joseph
Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 | 02:16 PM
It's no wonder that the Netherlands is such a confused mess if people there think that chimpanzees are like humans. Maybe a few more beheadings of Dutch people by Moroccan chimps will finally wake them up!
Tiffany
in Kansas
Posted: Wed Aug 17, 2005 | 12:37 PM
holy shit.. i did want a monkey too before i heard about this mess!! confused
austin
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 | 06:40 PM
holy crapoly man that would suck to be this guy but seriously how does the chimp severe the foot i mean did it just yank it off or like bite it or what?
lindsay
Posted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 | 11:33 AM
big surprise no i love monkies!
clue-by-four
in Chicago
Posted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 | 02:07 AM
To the person from Holland:

You are correct, chimps do APPEAR to kill just for the sake of killing.
-HOWEVER-
Please note that this is NOT "like warfare".
War occurs due to religion, conquest or retaliation for large-scale senseless violence.
War does NOT occur 'for the sake of killing'.
Well, Westmoreland..... anyway, any war simply just to kill would in fact be genocide and an anomaly that cannot be called war at all. eg: milosevic

And yeah, the chimps chewed off all of the parts that poor man lost in the attack. I must say that if I were married to a woman that sat by for 5-7 minutes while i had my face, fingers, testes and feet violently mauled off by chimps gnashing mouths, I would knock her the fuck out the second i healed. Seriously. What a total COWARD..... watching for 5-7 minutes and doing NOTHING is CRIMINAL!!!!!
everett
in united states
Posted: Mon Sep 22, 2008 | 01:37 AM
Although chimps may seem dumb, they aren't. And who is is at the top of the food chain? There have been reports of Chimpanzees using sharpened sticks, that they sharpen with their own teeth, to hunt humans. You might have your doubts about Chimps, but the truth is they are 5 times than the average human. The avarge Chimpanzee weighting in at 135 pounds can pull with ONE arm over 950 pounds. And can push with one arm over 800 pounds. So next time you take a nature hike through africa, your top predatore may not be a lion, tiger, or crocodile, but a spear wielding chimpanzee.
Page 1 of 1 pages

Name:

Email (if you want to be notified of responses):

Location:

URL:

Note: To prove that you're a human being, not an automated spam bot, you've got to type in the word you see below. If you register as a member of the site you won't have to do this. Once registered, you'll then also need to login. If you're seeing this notice, and you've already registered, that means you haven't logged in. As a member you also won't have to enter your personal info every time you leave a comment.

Submit the word you see below:


Smileys

Remember my personal information

Notify me of follow-up comments?